Have you ever experienced being pressured by your relatives and friends to enter into a relationship already because YOU are getting older and no one’s courting you yet???
As if by that act, men would come and court you? As if it wasn’t your all-day no, all-year long prayer – “Lord, give me a man to love, and who will love me back!” and yet, still there’s none!
I graduated high school and college and had not a boyfriend! Very focused on my studies, and knowing how my parents are working for my education – I graduated Cum Laude.. but I have no boyfriend!:)
It may be just me feeling the pressure every time, relatives, would ask if I have a boyfriend already and that it’s about time I have one.. and I would unconsciously come out with all the excuses about studies and all, face the mirror and see a beautiful swan, but men maybe seeing otherwise!!!
It’s funny now, looking back, how every Lenten season, our family would do “Visita Iglesia” and to all the churches that we would visit, my prayer is just the same “Lord, find me a boyfriend!” haha year after year after year.
And then at 24, he came! No, they came! – to the point that I need to choose which one! And fast forward, I got married, but that’s another story…
You maybe wondering what happened in between? How I survived years of single blessedness and no boyfriend since birth syndrome despite the eagerness to have one! Well, here’s what I did and I am pretty sure, someone, somewhere, sometime will benefit from my lovely experience.
First, I buried myself in Self-Help books, funny but being a book-lover that I am, I love the smell of National Bookstore – Self-Help book section! With the books that I’ve read, I learned to love myself more and more, I learned to accept and trust people around me, I realized a lot of things about me and my universe, how my thoughts are changing me, how my actions are affecting others and most especially how I am attracting the persons that I want or not want to be in my life. Reading Self-Help books is a BIG FACTOR why everything about me changed!
Second, I attended Leadership Training Seminars! Having a passion for learning and growth made me just want to learn so much more, so I’ll be so much more too! There’s no time to waste! I may not be a leader of my organization, but I am a leader of my own thoughts! I am a leader of my own life. Reasons don’t count anymore, only what results I am producing, making sure I am responsible and accountable for my actions. Leadership seminars helped!
Third, I visualized! From all the insights, all the trainings of all my books and facilitator mentors. I know in due time, my vision will come, because I have my heart set in to it! I know what I want, “a man – who will love and accept me as I am!”, “a man who knows how to listen and to understand”, “a man who is God-fearing”, and because I know what I want to have, I became who I want to have! Before I receive, I need to give. Embracing my “wants” in my man, made me become that! and made me attract the man of my vision. And it worked!
I realized, I will never have control in what other people may think of me, what they say about me, what other people told them about me… all this I have no control of. BUT, I can control ME. People will always have something negative to say, but at the end of the day, what matters is what I am saying to myself! People may pressure me because, I do not conform to their social ways, but that doesn’t matter, for as long as I know who I am and what direction I am going, then I am fine.
And true enough, at 24 I had my share. I guess, I’m a very late bloomer.. a caterpillar stuck! but in time flew.. unique and different!
As if by that act, men would come and court you? As if it wasn’t your all-day no, all-year long prayer – “Lord, give me a man to love, and who will love me back!” and yet, still there’s none!
I graduated high school and college and had not a boyfriend! Very focused on my studies, and knowing how my parents are working for my education – I graduated Cum Laude.. but I have no boyfriend!:)
It may be just me feeling the pressure every time, relatives, would ask if I have a boyfriend already and that it’s about time I have one.. and I would unconsciously come out with all the excuses about studies and all, face the mirror and see a beautiful swan, but men maybe seeing otherwise!!!
It’s funny now, looking back, how every Lenten season, our family would do “Visita Iglesia” and to all the churches that we would visit, my prayer is just the same “Lord, find me a boyfriend!” haha year after year after year.
And then at 24, he came! No, they came! – to the point that I need to choose which one! And fast forward, I got married, but that’s another story…
You maybe wondering what happened in between? How I survived years of single blessedness and no boyfriend since birth syndrome despite the eagerness to have one! Well, here’s what I did and I am pretty sure, someone, somewhere, sometime will benefit from my lovely experience.
First, I buried myself in Self-Help books, funny but being a book-lover that I am, I love the smell of National Bookstore – Self-Help book section! With the books that I’ve read, I learned to love myself more and more, I learned to accept and trust people around me, I realized a lot of things about me and my universe, how my thoughts are changing me, how my actions are affecting others and most especially how I am attracting the persons that I want or not want to be in my life. Reading Self-Help books is a BIG FACTOR why everything about me changed!
Second, I attended Leadership Training Seminars! Having a passion for learning and growth made me just want to learn so much more, so I’ll be so much more too! There’s no time to waste! I may not be a leader of my organization, but I am a leader of my own thoughts! I am a leader of my own life. Reasons don’t count anymore, only what results I am producing, making sure I am responsible and accountable for my actions. Leadership seminars helped!
Third, I visualized! From all the insights, all the trainings of all my books and facilitator mentors. I know in due time, my vision will come, because I have my heart set in to it! I know what I want, “a man – who will love and accept me as I am!”, “a man who knows how to listen and to understand”, “a man who is God-fearing”, and because I know what I want to have, I became who I want to have! Before I receive, I need to give. Embracing my “wants” in my man, made me become that! and made me attract the man of my vision. And it worked!
I realized, I will never have control in what other people may think of me, what they say about me, what other people told them about me… all this I have no control of. BUT, I can control ME. People will always have something negative to say, but at the end of the day, what matters is what I am saying to myself! People may pressure me because, I do not conform to their social ways, but that doesn’t matter, for as long as I know who I am and what direction I am going, then I am fine.
And true enough, at 24 I had my share. I guess, I’m a very late bloomer.. a caterpillar stuck! but in time flew.. unique and different!
Comments
Post a Comment
Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
I really appreciate your comments - as I would also want to learn from you, to connect with your thoughts and to know I have enlightened your path in my own way.
If you like this blog, you may subscribe, click the G+ or FB Like button.
Unfortunately, inappropriate, unfriendly and pointless comments (SPAM) will be deleted.
Thank you!
NAMASTE.